I’m going to share with you my little  humiliating, embarrassing, ego crushing, self esteem destroying moment from my audition tonight. Because if I share it with you, it won’t own me, or define me, or something like that. Right? Whatever. Here it goes. Tonight I auditioned for the musical Oklahoma. I know I did a good job because they asked me to stay for a callback. They wanted to hear me sing for the part of Ado Annie. I was pretty happy with that considering she is one of the main roles, and one of the “younger” characters in the show. As I looked around at the other girls asked to stay, they looked like the typical girls I see at auditions. Young, pretty, young. And for once, I felt like I was being grouped in with them. I was being asked to stay and try out for the same character that they were being seen for! This was big. This was exciting. I had to contain myself. I couldn’t let them know that this didn’t happen all the time. I didn’t want to come across as a newb, as my son calls it. So, we all went into the audition room, all of us “young chicks”, and learned the song for Ado Annie. Then they wanted to hear us individually. There was one note in the song that was particularly difficult to hit, and we, the girls, discussed it together and laughed about how we probably wouldn’t hit it when it was our turn. I walked in to face the directors with all the confidence I could muster. It must have been enough, because I nailed it. That note? Not a problem. So, you’re probably wondering why this is a humiliating, embarrassing, ego...

One of the things I love about being an actress is that I get to play pretend. I mean, come on. Who doesn’t wish they could be someone else every once in a while? I think that is what drew me into theater as  a young girl, the thought of being someone else, taking on another personality…and it was, normal. Applauded even. Stepping into someone else’s life, being someone you could never dream of being, behaving in a way that is completely different from how you behave, saying things you didn’t know you could say. It’s very alluring. Today I took on the persona of Roxy Hart from the musical Chicago. It was fun. She is so very different from me. I sang for a convention at a hotel near Universal Studios. Their theme was “All That Jazz”, so it seemed fitting to have someone come in dressed in a flapper dress and sing “All That Jazz” from Chicago, with all new words fitting their program of course. As I worked the crowd in my fringed dress and pearls, singing lyrics like, “Start this conference, it’s a whoopee spot…where the ice tea’s cold, but the program’s HOT”…I could tell they were digging it. I channeled Catherine Zeta Jones AND Renee Zellweger….and the crowd loved it. I belted out the last chorus and had them on their feet at the end. It was great. It was a little awkward walking through the hotel towards the parking lot, in my fringed flapper dress and headband, no longer protected by the convention banners announcing why I was there. I got a few glances and judgmental stares. I started to feel like Julia Roberts character in Pretty Woman as she walked through the Beverly Wilshire. I refrained myself...

So today I am auditioning for Titanic, The Experience, which is a tourist attraction here in Orlando. It is an interactive museum/Dinner Show with full scale room re-creations, memorabilia and artifacts from the Titanic. There are interactive story tellers (the role I am auditioning for) that give tours through the museum and take visitors back to the sights, sounds, and emotions of that fateful night. Sounds fun, right? Don’t worry, the museum is on dry land. I am usually pretty calm at auditions, and don’t get the jitters. What bothers me the most is when I walk in and look around and notice that everyone else at the audition is practically in diapers! Where are the people my age? I mean, I took a break from acting to raise my kids, but I’m not THAT old. Did I miss the notice saying we had to quit auditioning for things when we turned 35? Or 30? Or even 27? Because I don’t think they are older than that. That’s ok..because every show that has a “mother” role, or “old lady”, or “grandma”….it’s mine! Back to Titanic. So, I have to do a 1 min comic monologue…which I am still preparing. It’s almost 11 am the day of. Yes, I know. You don’t have to tell me. I like to put pressure on myself. It makes me feel like I work harder. or something. They also want us to be able to do as many of these accents as possible. Irish, British, Cockney, English High Society From 1912. Um…great. I can speak English, does that count? So, I started playing around with the accents. This is what I came up with. Click Here To See...